How long is each therapy session?
Sessions are 45 minutes long. 24 hours cancellation notice is required to avoid being charged for a missed appointment.
Do you offer phone-based therapy?
Yes. Therapy sessions can be conducted over the phone for clients who are unable to come to the office or who live outside the Knoxville area. Phone therapy provides the same benefits of in-person counseling.
What are your payment terms and options?
Payment can be made by check or credit card (through Square) and is due at each session.
Is your office wheelchair accessible?
Frequently Asked Questions about Couples Counseling
How to be successful in therapy?
Truthfully, one of the best ways to be successful in therapy is to feel you have found the "right" therapist. How will you know if you have found the "right" therapist? It is important that you do not feel judged by your therapist, it is important that you feel like your therapist understands what you are saying, feeling, and thinking, then it is important for your therapist to help you understand why you are feeling the way you are feeling, and finally, help you say what you want to say to your partner so you can be understood.
The "client couple" can help create a successful environment by coming to therapy with a willingness to be truthful, a willingness to take ownership for their contributions to the presenting issues/conflicts and to come to therapy with a willingness to participate, like your marital life depended upon it. It will be a collaborative process between the therapist and the couple.
How can big issues like affairs be resolved in therapy?
First, know that even great marriages go through terrible times. Life is a school, and marriage is the one of the hardest classrooms. Sometimes, couples need tune-ups, and even though it might feel like a complete overhaul is needed, have patience and be willing to work on your partnership.
All issues can be big because little issues get ignored year after year and then they grow into bigger issues like an affair. Little/big issues get resolved with the same building blocks that create success in therapy. One purpose of therapy is to help each person hear each other. It is powerful to have your partner really listen to "you", hear your point of view, care about your viewpoint, maybe even for the first time.
I have not met a couple that did not want to forgive each other. But I have worked with couples that struggled to forgive their partner because of a breakdown in understanding - a power struggle around who is at fault, resulting in bitterness and resentment, making resolution elusive. Both people must be a part of the solution to get to where you want to go, which means you must be willing to say, "I am sorry for, I apologize for . . .".
Blame must be eliminated and replaced with the ability to communicate why you feel hurt or not appreciated. When there has been an affair, the marital life is divided into two sections: before the affair and after the affair is known. The affair must be dealt with first. Remorse must be truthfully expressed, deep hurt appropriately expressed, and questions answered. Then we can look at what was not working in the marriage before the affair and come to understanding why the couple had become distant and lost their intimacy.
If you want resolution, you will obtain resolution. If both people are working toward the same goal, there is no reason you cannot reach your outcome; however, if you are paddling in different directions, you will not go anywhere.
How do you prevent problems and build strong marriages?
- Do not always need to be right.
- Do not always think there is something to fix.
- Do not give your opinion unless asked.
- Do not want your partner to feel the same way you feel.
- Do not think you can read each other's mind.
- Do not argue about who is right and who is wrong.
- Care about your partner's point of view.
- Appreciate your differences.
- Show respect.
- Express kindness.
- Look, really look, at each other when talking and talk more.
- Listen.
- Play fair.
- Take turns.
- Say I am sorry, from the heart.
- Take responsibility for your mistakes.
- Do not assume.
- Laugh often.
- Have adventures together.
- Respect, appreciate and enjoy each other's body when invited.
